Conflicted
by doodlefreak
Summary: His feelings are rooted from both appreciation and friendship. But some are more difficult than others to understand. Soul/Black Star, SoulxMaka


**I... am SO tired. Don't know what I was thinking when I wrote this, but I'm partially satisfied with it. 'Partially' because I know I'm going to end up hating it, and then ultimately editing it when I'm finally coherent. But I'll post it in hopes that you'll like it, and maybe if someone else does I'll reconsider taking it down.**

**Warnings: This has both het AND shounen-ai. Um, more specifically mention of SoulxMaka and mainly Soul/Black Star/Soul. So... if anyone has a problem, don't read. I like both of those pairings and felt the need to cram them in together for my first time meddling in this fandom. And, sheesh, there aren't enough yaoi fics here...yet. Plenty of SoMa, though. :cough: This was extremely difficult to write, by the way. Mostly because both of their personalities are so sporadic.**

**Disclaimer: I hold no rights to Soul Eater, and therefore don't make any money off this. No one would buy it anyway ;___;**

**Now please... _enjoy_.  
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Conflicted**

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What an annoying guy._

Soul looked over, his head rested firmly on the palm of his hand, elbow rested on the low sitting table he was occupying. His crimson eyes gleamed with irritation with their usual deep set underlying presence accentuated with the ever present bags resting under just below his eyes. Gazing at the fellow next to him, he scowled, teeth bared with a tick at the side of his lips. He wasn't pleased with being interrupted from his TV show.

"Quiet down," he mumbled. "No one wants to hear the crap you're spewing right now."

"Eh?" Black Star looked over his shoulder, pausing from his rants momentarily, at Soul who was glaring at him with a bored sort of tone. "What was that?"

Soul sighed and looked back at the screen of the television set, frowning. "I said; no one wants to hear that crap right now. I'm watching something."

Black Star let his arms drop from their position of flexing, as he had just been in the middle of proclaiming how better of a fighter he was than the fake wrestlers on the program Soul was currently watching and turned fully to face Soul. When he didn't get any further reaction he frowned and went to sit kiddy-corner to Soul at the square, low raised table. His hands went to position themselves on the floor in-between his legs so that he could lean forward, peering at his friend better, he leered at the side of the other's face.

Soul looked over casually. "What do you want?" His eyes turned back to the screen.

"You," Black Star started. "Are a wimp."

White brows furrowed first before Soul turned his head to look at Black Star. "How is it that I'm a wimp? Weren't you the one just telling me how great you were? …you haven't proved it to me yet."

"Hah!" Black Star laughed. "How can you not see this greatness! I am the epitome of Godliness!"

Soul snorted, turning his head back and closing his eyes. "It's not as if you even know what 'epitome' means, anyway."

At this Black Star had no comeback. He sat there lamely for a few moments, a blank stare on his face with an open mouth, before he finally crossed his arms and huffed indignantly, giving up on searching for both a comeback and the very vacant dictionary he held within his mind. "Bah, what're you so pissy about today? I'll show you!"

Soul had had enough; he reached for the remote and turned up the volume, maxing it out and successfully drowning out the yells of his friend and going back to watching the show he had no interest in whatsoever. When he no longer heard the faint buzz of Black's caterwauls he looked over with faint interest, wondering if he had left the room, and indeed he had—he was no where in sight.

He sighed and finally turned down the volume, taking his chin out of the now sweaty palm of his hand and leaning back, using his elbows as leverage. Bored eyes stared tiredly at the ceiling, tracing invisible patters over the smooth texture of the beige paint to stave off boredom. Some time after his tenth circle he sighed and shut his eyes, wondering if the headache starting to come on had anything to do with the fact that he had just abused his eardrums to the point of pain.

Black Star's words came back to him and he ground his teeth, knowing there was nothing pissy about him tonight, just that he was somewhat dwelling over something that almost held no relevance to it at all. He dismissed the thought, finally giving in to that, yes, there was relevance to it, and it was bothering him.

The reason Black Star was spending the night over at his and Maka's apartment was because she had gone over to sleep at Tsubaki's, and that might have something to do with what had transpired that afternoon, but Soul instantly blocked off the thoughts, saying to himself that he was right and Maka was wrong, no matter what happened to flash through his mind to immediately sass back to himself.

He laid back and rolled on his side, creasing his brow. "Stupid Maka…"

"I KNEW IT!"

Soul immediately jumped up and hit the wall on the other side of the room, clutching at his chest to stop its erratic beating, and possibly saving himself from his heart jutting out from his chest.

He was met by the grinning face of his friend, who had his hands on his hips in a very triumphant manner. "You fought with Maka again, didn't you?"

Soul's eyebrow ticked. "That has nothing to do with you…"

Black Star went to sit next to him by the wall, resting his arm on his propped up knee. "It has everything to do with me when your attention isn't focused on the greatest one in the room."

"Really? And who would that be?" Soul deadpanned.

Black Star's ego got pierced, but he tried his best to remain calm, thinking that it would be best and smoother on his part, something that would irritate Soul. "Me, of course."

At not having succeeded on getting the rise out of Black Star that he wanted, Soul went back to being aloof. He slanted his head back up and continued to stare at the ceiling, somewhat calmed by Black Star's presence and aura being so close. "Where did you go, anyway?"

"No where. I was right here the entire time."

"An annoying guy like you, I wouldn't doubt you were. Though, spying is a bit beneath you."

Black Star glared strait ahead. "It figures you'd say something like that, even though I was only trying to use my powers to better understand what you're so worked up about."

"Words like that will get you killed one day, you know."

Black Star waved off-handedly. "Yeah, yeah. As if a God like me would ever let that happen."

"Che," Soul scoffed. "A God like you is going to get himself to be dead one day."

"Rgh," Having about just enough of Soul's back talk, Black Star moved and took hold of his collar, bringing their faces close together. "That's it. You're getting annoying. What's up with you, anyway? What happened to being 'cool', huh? There's nothing cool about having something up you're a—"

Soul glared and cut him off. "I wouldn't finish that sentence if I were you."

Black Star glared back. "And if I did?"

"I'd have to reduce your lifespan."

"As if I'd let you kill _me_!" Black Star yelled, fisting Soul's shirt tightly and yanking him down to the ground with a heavy thud, hovering over him warningly.

"Ghn," Soul winced. "You're in for a beating, you annoying little—"

It seemed words were getting cut off a lot lately. Black Star had quickly turned that scathing sentence into and opening for himself, leaning down and flicking his tongue over Soul's upper lip, sucking it in before moving his own lips fully over Soul's. The other didn't react for a few, long heartbeats, just staring with wide eyes at his friend.

Soul pushed back on his friend. "What are you _doing_?"

"Just shut up and kiss back." Black Star moved back down, sealing himself against Soul again.

Then, without much thought it seemed, Soul cupped the back of Black Star's head, pulling him closer and shifting his weight, slanting his lips to the appropriate angle that helped them both to enjoy what they were transfixed on more. Black Star hummed in approval, sliding down on Soul's lap and pressing their chest's together whilst arching his back to fit into the other's body more firmly.

One red eye slit open, peering at the satiated and pleased face of Star's features and then closing once more. They broke apart, leaning their heads together and panting profusely.

Black Star grinned. "So, how was that? Distracting enough?"

Soul stared back a long moment, perplexed slightly by the flushed face of his friend. Smirking to himself, though not letting the other see, he snorted. "You're a pretty horrible kisser, you know that?"

"Ack," Black Star scowled. "Smug little bastard. I'll show you!"

He then swooped back down and sloppily pressed his lips against Soul's, the other letting that smirk of his finally spread out across his face. Black Star breathed hard through his nose, not letting Soul best him for a second.

Though they had kept up pace almost perfectly for a few, sound seconds, Soul quickly got bored of the chaste kisses and opted for something different. Slyly, he slipped his tongue out and ran it across the seam of the other's lips. Startled, Black Star opened his mouth, unaware that he had just lost out and granted his friend full access to the rest of his orifice.

"Mm—mm!" he struggled against Soul, but the hand on the back of his head, firmly grasping his blue locks between solidly grabbing fingers, wasn't about to let its prey escape. Sooner than later he gave in and relaxed, moving his tongue to try and push the other out.

Soul used the hand that wasn't currently occupied to push himself up from the floor, using the leverage to push Black Star back and successfully ravage his slick mouth. His tongue rubbed against Star's eliciting a few, albeit shy, reactions from him. He moaned fully and drawn out when that tongue finally twined with his own, creating a few lewd squishing noises between their lips.

Black Star, rightfully embarrassed that he had let himself lose out, even for a little while, finally retaliated and grabbed a handful of Soul's shirt. Using his firm hold on the cotton fabric yanked up Soul's entire body and flipped their positions, making himself beneath Soul and taking full control of the kiss. His tongue glided passed Soul's lip in a heartbeat, taking his time exploring every indent of Soul's mouth in detail.

In the end, Soul was the one to break the kiss, pulling back with a gasp, hands on either side of Black Star's head. Heavy air mingled together between them, the atmosphere in the room almost a little too hot and unbearable.

Black Star gasped and closed his eyes, swallowing. Soul watched his every move with calm interest, trying to regain his momentarily lost breath, hands fisted on the carpet next to Black Star.

"Hehe, told you I wouldn't lose to you." Black Star giggled, sighing.

Soul remained quiet, fists flexing with repressed emotion. Black Star opened his eyes, noticing the very sudden switch in emotion coming from his friend, the delighted face falling from his features.

"Soul…?" he asked with caution.

But he had closed his eyes, brows knit together and teeth grinding. He let out a whisper, but Black Star couldn't make it out, asking his friend to repeat it. A few moments passed of tense staring, Soul remaining the same throughout the entire situation.

Black Star fidgeted and looked away, somewhat perturbed by Soul's serious demeanor, but not willing to give up quite that easily. "Are you…okay? I couldn't hear. Speak u—"

"_What about Maka_?!"

Blue hair slid across the carpet as Black Star snapped back, surprised by Soul's loud tone. He sat back, not daring to move, mouth hanging agape.

"I like Maka! _Maka_!" His lips pursed as he refrained from biting his lips, not wanting to draw blood as he knew he would be prone to do if he allowed himself the action. "I'm her weapon… her other half. That means nothing if I'm not willing to… if I'm willing to give up my emotions for her with this sort of thing. How can I do that and expect to become a Death Scythe, huh?!" As the first part was mostly directed toward himself, he became aware that this was not entirely his fault and immediately directed his anger on Black Star, thinking that he would have the answer he was incapable of giving himself.

Black Star didn't know how to answer that. He slowly drug himself out from under Soul and propped himself up on his forearms, a serious expression rooting.

Soul continued. "If I expect to become cool… I can't be like this." He looked up, his malicious looking crimson eyes looking weak and drained.

With such conflicting aura's in the two situations Black Star had been in so far, he had no idea how to make the transition from being hot and commanding, to serious and understanding. As it was, he did not want to feel pity for Soul either. He wanted to be his friend, and yet something so much more at the same time. It was strange, but he knew he shouldn't be having these sorts of feelings. Never before had he thought these things, not even in their younger days. What was he to do? What was Soul expecting him to do?

"I…" Soul hung his head.

Sensing that Soul's rant was over, he let out a small breath of air and cupped the back of the other's head, bringing their foreheads together once more. Soul's eyes widened and Black Star smirked. "I don't know how to deal with your emotions… stupid."

"Eh," Soul started to protest, but before he could get another word in Black Star had pressed their lips together in a slow, innocent kiss. They parted, and Soul had nothing to say.

"Listen you," Black Star said on Soul's lips. "I don't care how you feel about Maka. I won't lose out to her when it comes to you."

This time when he went forward to kiss Soul, the other met him halfway, not knowing what he was doing in some way. His hands moved automatically to grasp at Black Star's shoulders, pushing him away and bringing him forward both at the same time. He could feel the smirk on his lips, see the smug attitude surrounding his friend at having a reaction such as this brought forward by such simple, completely arrogant words, but he couldn't find it in him to care. He kissed back.

This time when they separated Soul had heavy lidded eyes, a start of a resolve brimming behind red irises. His lips parted and closed together, trying to say something, but his vocal chords didn't want to work for him.

Black Star smirked. "Stop worrying… Maka isn't here. She won't judge what she doesn't know, right?"

Soul closed his eyes. "You're half right. But…" he paused, chewing on his lower lip. "_I_ can judge what I'm doing."

"But as long as I don't let you think, it's fine, right?"

"Ah," he looked up, somewhat relieved to see his friend's bright, wide smile. "I see…"

"Yeah. So, so…?" he cupped the sides of Soul's face, still happy he wasn't being completely rejected. "I'll fight for your completely attention, right? When I'm done, the only thing you'll be able to see is me!"

Soul's eyes widened. "You're… going to fight… for me?" he asked a bit in disbelief.

Black Star grinned. "That's the idea."

Soul frowned and then scoffed, turning his head the other way, forcefully making Black Star's grip on his face loosen and finally drop. "A cool guy like me can't have that kind of attention. It's unmanly."

Black Star continued to grin. "Whatever."

And Soul was relieved.

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**Sincerely sorry for any spelling/grammar mistakes. As for the personalities... don't think I could do any better. I apologize.**

**So. I love to hear from my readers. Makes me feel all gooey inside :)**


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